I never thought i’d be where I am today. Alhamdulillah. I am so happy. I can’t believe I did it. You know the saying “it takes an army to…” or “Rome wasn’t built in one day”…. it truly feels endless when you are living in the cusp of a terrible era. It feels as if it will never end, but it gets uglier before it gets better. Or as my beloved Mac Miller (rest in beautiful peace) “before things come together, they have to fall apart.” I am stronger than I can even comprehend, and at the end of the day I believe in karma. I believe in justice. I am patient. Nice guys DO finish last. The best has yet to come and I’m not sure how it can get better than this. But I welcome my future with open arms. I am in control.

I kept my promise to myself. I am becoming the person of my dreams, I won’t stop, even if I am everything i’ve always wanted to be, I won’t stop. I am the sun, I am a beautiful soul and I know the impact I make in a persons life. I am unforgettable. I am unique, I make my mark. No one can ever be me. Apologies to anyone who’s ever lost me or to anyone who’s ever gotten lost in me. Except I’m not sorry, that you thought my life was to serve you. And the best part is seeing how torn they get when i remove their toxicity. When I no longer want them.

My enemies want to be friends with my other enemies, I don’t let it get to me~ done.

by the unknown, by the amount that I lack of~ by the amount that I have the opportunity to learn.  Every second you are not using to your productiveness is time wasted on bad decisions if it never benefits you.  I am motivated by what I am capable of, I am unstoppable.  You reach a spiritual level within yourself that creates a self-waking epiphany when you realize you’re only confined to the boundaries you’ve built– you’ve surrounding yourself in, crack your shell and continue to reach the impossible. 

…i am inspired every day. 

for not having control of every situation so that it goes exactly how you wish.  Some things are not meant to be and that is okay.  Truly, I felt if you have no control over a situation, that’s an opportunity for you to by default relieve the stress that you could possibly embody by carrying this weight on your back.

There is no need to carry a grey cloud with you everywhere you go– you are the sun.  Don’t let the dark side shade your glow.  You are bright in every iridescent way.  

I am finding love for myself again… when I thought I lost the utmost respect, I find myself feeling familiar with who I once was.  I’m changing, growing, evolving; it comes with age and experience.  I am wiser, smarter, sharper, nothing will tear me down… again.

It’s a scary feeling, being lost– especially when you’ve had a concrete pedestal.  I felt uncomfortable in my own skin.  I lowered my standards and values for that which wasn’t deserving of my leniency to be dictated by the one I love just because I loved them a little much… more than myself.  This pain cost me my identity, but I realized when I feel lost, I find myself in a different place, a place I wouldn’t be if I didn’t reach it.  A place I wouldn’t reach if I wasn’t exposed to taking risks, chances, putting myself out.

I have learned and embodied life in its fullest effect and it took a toll on me that changed me for the better; I do not regret.  Either that or I do not remember what I regret, it is enough to bring me who I am today which is someone who loves themselves again even after an attempt of this world to try and defeat me.  My struggles made me who I am when I conquered them– my struggles will not conquer me. 

I embrace change in all its levels of difficulty.  I am proud of who I am becoming and where I am headed, I have nothing but faith that I am destined to live a purposeful life so long as I continue making decisions that embrace the person I want to be.  A better person, a better version of myself.